There's a statement that I'm sure all of us who are parents have said to our kids on numerous occasions. Let's take the same admonishment for just a moment and think about something.
Why do we work?
Well our most basic of needs is because we have to eat. If you don't work, you don't eat. It's a biblical principal spelled out for us in Proverbs and it makes pretty good common sense to us as well. Now this is in no way a slam on welfare and soup kitchens and the like. If we decide, as a people, to help those who need it, then by all means we should (also a biblical mandate). But those who refuse to work have no right to demand they be given anything by anyone.
But most of us don't work solely so that we can eat. We have cars, mortgages, kids, clothing, kids, health situations, KIDS... the list goes on and on. Today I stopped to think about what we work for in America. The simplest way I can put it is because we want things. Also, we want nice things. For some, we want the best things. Most of us do not have a driving passion within us to go to work because we want to. Now we try and fool ourselves a bit by trying to find a job that we like so that it feels less like work. But we work so that we can acquire nice things. Gotta have HDTV, surround sound, the newest iMac (ouch), clothes that are in style, a nice house with more room than we really need, a new car that gets 50 miles per gallon and has 45 airbags (for safety).
I made a conscious decision when our kids were born to not let work replace the responsibility we have of raising our kids. Kim and I have jobs that allow us to be home with our kids far more than other parents we know. We feel it's important for the kids to have us around in the formative years. Because of this belief, we don't have as much nice stuff as we could have. If Kim and I both had full time jobs, then we would make twice as much money as we make now. We'd have that new Honda Odyssey, the 50" plasma TV, the 6 bedroom house with swimming pool. But where would our kids be? Beyond our kids, why should we continue to fuel this never ending desire to fill our lives with things that a) don't last, b) ultimately don't satisfy and c) drive us into debts that aren't worth paying?
Right now there are alot of things I'd like to have. I'd like to have a bigger house. I have ideas for my business that need space that we currently don't have. I'd love to have a swimming pool. Being in Florida without a pool almost seems cruel (not really). Our van is in the shop for the third consecutive day (in a seemingly endless spiral of defects). We'll probably be replacing it soon enough. I'm an audio professional. But I don't have the latest surround sound set up here at home. I have a hand me down Pro Logic equipped receiver. Pro Logic! I work in the field of television, but I don't own a big screen HDTV. Somehow my 27" CRT standard definition TV is enough. I'd love to have a 1080p HDTV with a Blu-ray DVD player, don't misunderstand me.
But in all these things, I'm happy. I honestly and truly am happy. I'm content. I'm so thankful for all the things we have. That doesn't mean we have the perfect life, with no troubles at all. But I don't have to look at what my neighbor drives, or what my friends have to judge whether or not I'm successful (and happy). It's a freedom that too many people have traded in for the illusion of the American Dream. Don't get me wrong, I'm not bashing America. I've literally traveled all over the world, and I can tell you that the U.S. is where I most want to be. What I am saying is this: let's not get caught up in the trappings and greed of our culture which promises happiness but instead only gives us shackles. Shackled to a job so that we can have the latest, greatest_____. Evaluate your life; are you working just for stuff? Are you trading in all your time to fill your lives with things? All you parents out there, do you want to get to the day when your kids are 18 and you realize you missed them grow up so that you (or they) could have an iPhone (that'll be obsolete by then anyway)? Or a Mercedes Benz when a Mazda would do the job?
Stop and think.
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10 comments:
OK so I have to say Johnny and I both work full time jobs but don't have all those things either...of course we do both work in the school system!(ouch)
I was thinking the other day as I half listened to Oprah (for the 1st time in almost a year) on the radio. They were talking about true happiness and I realized. I am truly happy. Outside of being able to stay at home and have all the money to buy whatever I want (JK - maybe)I would change nothing!
Thanks for sharing.
Helen said:
OK so I have to say Johnny and I both work full time jobs but don't have all those things either...
I suppose I left myself open for that one. I actually didn't mean for it to sound like if you're working full-time jobs that you're neglecting your kids. Some folks have to work full-time jobs to pay the bills. But is it to pay for a car that's more expensive than you can afford? Or to pay for a house that's bigger than one family needs? These are rhetorical questions, Helen, not necessarily aimed at you. I realize that for some I'm preaching to the choir. I know that many people in America don't know how to be content - always wanting more, but are never satisfied, being miserable in the process.
ProLogic! PROLOGIC!!! How you get up in the morning, I have no idea. ;-)
It's been my experience so far that having kids and being married are both great ways to kill materialism and idolatry in my life. Making personal sacrifices so that my kids can have what they need is both painful and rewarding.
Now I've added small church pastor to the list. That plasma tv gets farther and farther away every day!
-Ben
The fact that I own a new Odyssey and a 50" plasma HDTV puts me at a disadvantage to comment here but hey his grace covers all.
I think Christina and I have known this for some time but just recently have we starting making the transitions to "ministry life". We are shifting our budget to do with a lot less. That alone changes the way you do things. Since we aren't spending time spending money we are spending quality time with the girls. (yes the plasma tv remains off many days and nights).
We have found that the striving for more or the American dream can and often does create stress, frustration and anger. Jesus actually knew what he was talking about when he said not to store up treasures here on earth.
My daughter imparted some wisdom and much needed joy to my heart the other night. We were headed out to Target when she said, "I just want to stay home and play with you." That's just what we did. We forgot what we were going out for and still can't remember 2 weeks later. Must of been something useless.
Kev said:
"The fact that I own a new Odyssey and a 50" plasma HDTV puts me at a disadvantage to comment here but hey his grace covers all."
I think God wants you sell these worldly possessions so that you will prosper in your "priestly duties" (think Nacho Libre). I also think God wants me to help you dispose of these. Don't worry about getting all your money back. What monetary value could you put on God's ministry? Think of it as a life lesson! LOL
I'm sure you can be a servant and take these burdens off my hands. Though the plasma lets me minister to my men's bible study group with Monday night football.
Redskins vs. Philli what a waste of plasma life. I might just have to watch the ASU vs. Mich. game again. oops I mean...I'll be playing with the girls.
So I certainly was not busting on your post, I think you are have some great points. We as Americans have a very difficult time figuring out what is a need and what is a want. And we do sometimes get caught up in the rat race of keeping up with the Jones. Even though Johnny and I both work, we work jobs that (at least for me)award me the opportunity to be off at every break with my children...summers are the greatest thing in the world still to me, because I spend all day everyday with my children. I am never ready for school to start back.
What I have really started working on this school year is seeing my job as a mission field instead of a source of money. I've heard it over and over again, but it had just become a cliche. This was brought to my attention when one of my most challenging children ended up attending my church. Her mother was so appreciative of all I had done for her and still stops me in the hall to tell me how Kindergarten is going.
I'm not saying there wouldn't have been a way at some point for me to stay at home and have a single family income, but I do think it is harder than it used to be and since I have to work, I'd rather view it as a ministry than a waste of time.
Sorry, I probably got side tracked, I was with 18 4 year olds all day.
"Though the plasma lets me minister to my men's bible study group with Monday night football."
Just turn the sound down so you won't have to listen to Tony Cornhusker flapping his gums. ESPN has ruined two of my favorite sports (NFL and NASCAR) with their awful announcers.
Interesting post. Tab took a full time job at the first of the year which got her back into social work (her college degree) and working with the elderly (her passion). It has come at a price and we are talking about what we want to do about it. We still don't have those "nice" things. Honestly I don't really want them. The 50mpg would be nice, but unless it comes with all wheel drive, I will have to settle for less mpg anyway. Our main concern with our workload is saving for college. Our kids are 13 and 10 - time is running short. So we are having to make sacrifices in the present to work towards provision in the future. It still sucks to not have enough time to play AS MUCH AS WE WANT TO AS A FAMILY. The homework load is much greater now and the school involvement and sports and music and church and.... you all know how that goes. If you don't you will shortly. One of the main questions we are asking is how much to sacrifice now for what we know is coming in just a few years vs. being able to really make the most of now and sacrificing what we need to have in a few short years (which will probably arrive the middle of next week the way time is flying). Good post Rod. Life is full of decisions. I choose to frame is a "managing opportunities".
Well Reed, it's interesting that you say these things, as I've been thinking about future plans with kids as well. We also are getting to the point where we need to be getting real serious about college planning. We've not done such a hot job up until now. I've seriously been considering getting a full-time job here soon and getting out of the freelance business. Kim just took a new job this week working in home health (she starts in a month or so). She took a pay cut for the job, but the hours are so much better. We shall see what happens soon enough.
Life never is what you expected it to be.
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